Alliterative and holiness go hand-in-hand or so it would appear...
Have you ever heard of "BB" - no, not Brigitte Bardot but rather the one, the only Betty Bowers?
Anyone? No one? Really?!?
A recent five-minute short titled "Betty Bowers: America's Best Christian" should have caught your attention - it is as recent as 2008 can be to your collective mind...! (Who won the World Series again, in 2008, hmm? Who won the Super Bowl, the Grey Cup, the World Cup, Euro Cup and damnable Stanley Cup too, for that matter, hmm?!? Nobody knows - no one remembers; unless, that is, it was your most favorite of favorite teams winning, you do not remember, NO! But we are digressing right now...)
So, yes - it is not all that surprising that you do not remember (or have never even heard of) Betty Bowers.
Now, if she was America's Greatest Harlot - you'd remember her and know her well and recognize her from a mile away... rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrright? Right.
But since she is *merely* America's Best Christian (and only allegedly at that) she went by you easily and went back into complete anonymat fairly effortlessly and with relative ease after a 5-minute (or 15-minute, right) media frenzy of sorts...
Now, from BB we go to LL - me! Love me or hate me,if you're reading this blog or have been to a myriad other unfathomable places, both online and offline, you remember ME! You even KNOW me - a bit! And you know very well that, as it applied to good old DDP, the adage that goes something like "love me, hate me, you will never forget me" also applies oh-so very well to ME!
AND... If I was to claim anything about my Christianity, I may even refer to myself as "The Americas' Worst Christian" - yup, nothing less! Why? Well, I don't turn the other cheek, for instance! I am not devoted to one single denomination since I find it heresy to subscribe to any single, restrictive, narrow dogma when we are ALL Christians... (Well, those of us who aren't Muslims, Klingons or God-Knows-what, that is...!)
Back to BB now - if she was to introduce herself to us, she would most likely do in the following way, manner and style:
Greetings, my fellow computer-owning Christians. My name is Mrs. Betty Bowers and - as you already know - I'm America's Best Christian. While some might regard such a seemingly lofty title somewhat onerous to live up to, both piety and superiority are completely effortless to me, which is, no doubt, why I was conferred such an honor in the first place. As an American Christian, I have devoted my life to hectoring my Invisible Savior with requests for lots of cool stuff. It's a time-consuming hobby I call "prayer." I am the founder of Bringing Integrity To Christian Homemakers, which is a bit like Concerned Women for America, only slightly less concerned and with better shoes. I also oversee America's most successful Ex-Gay ministry (almost 2 saved souls out of over 150,000 dues-paying members - praise!) called BASH: Baptists Are Saving Homosexuals. Be a man, girl! "You'd all be in my prayers, if I only had that kind of time." Written by Anonymous
Note that this "anonymous" author is quite prolific indeed, having written nearly 50,000 reviews on IMDB, all as diversified in prosaic style as there is variety of titles and content there...! Well done, anon!
;)
Now, if I was to introduce myself, it would go somewhat like THIS:
Greetings - aye, it is I; Luminous Luciano, man of letters and refinement! I merely seek to reflect the Light as best as I can - as surely as the moon up in the sky reflects the glimmering beams emanating from the sun! Er... Can I go now?
In short, as far as Betty Bowers goes; she is, of course, a total and complete fake. Aye, Bowers is all bogus since it all is in reality but a creative brainchild of one Deven Green, a legend in her own mind and in Canada as well as on the net. Devious Deven (hope she's no relation to Red Green) has made it for herself with such shorts, nice little whimsical videos that garner quite a following in a short (no pun intended - it's way too damn easy!) time too! Why does she do it? Why does she claim she is the Best Christian? Well, most probably for the most unchristian reasons of all; for fame, fortune and earthly glory. If such things can ever be obtained through such claims, in this day and very secular age that we live in - that is!
She is, thus, after fame and the big mighty dollar - nothing else.
And THAT does NOT make Jesus very Happy AT ALL!
For He did not seek earthly riches - and, quite frankly, blogging frantically as I may do now, nor am I...!
So you can come to your own conclusions now, I do believe...
;)
Have you ever heard of "BB" - no, not Brigitte Bardot but rather the one, the only Betty Bowers?
Anyone? No one? Really?!?
A recent five-minute short titled "Betty Bowers: America's Best Christian" should have caught your attention - it is as recent as 2008 can be to your collective mind...! (Who won the World Series again, in 2008, hmm? Who won the Super Bowl, the Grey Cup, the World Cup, Euro Cup and damnable Stanley Cup too, for that matter, hmm?!? Nobody knows - no one remembers; unless, that is, it was your most favorite of favorite teams winning, you do not remember, NO! But we are digressing right now...)
So, yes - it is not all that surprising that you do not remember (or have never even heard of) Betty Bowers.
Now, if she was America's Greatest Harlot - you'd remember her and know her well and recognize her from a mile away... rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrright? Right.
But since she is *merely* America's Best Christian (and only allegedly at that) she went by you easily and went back into complete anonymat fairly effortlessly and with relative ease after a 5-minute (or 15-minute, right) media frenzy of sorts...
Now, from BB we go to LL - me! Love me or hate me,if you're reading this blog or have been to a myriad other unfathomable places, both online and offline, you remember ME! You even KNOW me - a bit! And you know very well that, as it applied to good old DDP, the adage that goes something like "love me, hate me, you will never forget me" also applies oh-so very well to ME!
AND... If I was to claim anything about my Christianity, I may even refer to myself as "The Americas' Worst Christian" - yup, nothing less! Why? Well, I don't turn the other cheek, for instance! I am not devoted to one single denomination since I find it heresy to subscribe to any single, restrictive, narrow dogma when we are ALL Christians... (Well, those of us who aren't Muslims, Klingons or God-Knows-what, that is...!)
Back to BB now - if she was to introduce herself to us, she would most likely do in the following way, manner and style:
Greetings, my fellow computer-owning Christians. My name is Mrs. Betty Bowers and - as you already know - I'm America's Best Christian. While some might regard such a seemingly lofty title somewhat onerous to live up to, both piety and superiority are completely effortless to me, which is, no doubt, why I was conferred such an honor in the first place. As an American Christian, I have devoted my life to hectoring my Invisible Savior with requests for lots of cool stuff. It's a time-consuming hobby I call "prayer." I am the founder of Bringing Integrity To Christian Homemakers, which is a bit like Concerned Women for America, only slightly less concerned and with better shoes. I also oversee America's most successful Ex-Gay ministry (almost 2 saved souls out of over 150,000 dues-paying members - praise!) called BASH: Baptists Are Saving Homosexuals. Be a man, girl! "You'd all be in my prayers, if I only had that kind of time." Written by Anonymous
Note that this "anonymous" author is quite prolific indeed, having written nearly 50,000 reviews on IMDB, all as diversified in prosaic style as there is variety of titles and content there...! Well done, anon!
;)
Now, if I was to introduce myself, it would go somewhat like THIS:
Greetings - aye, it is I; Luminous Luciano, man of letters and refinement! I merely seek to reflect the Light as best as I can - as surely as the moon up in the sky reflects the glimmering beams emanating from the sun! Er... Can I go now?
In short, as far as Betty Bowers goes; she is, of course, a total and complete fake. Aye, Bowers is all bogus since it all is in reality but a creative brainchild of one Deven Green, a legend in her own mind and in Canada as well as on the net. Devious Deven (hope she's no relation to Red Green) has made it for herself with such shorts, nice little whimsical videos that garner quite a following in a short (no pun intended - it's way too damn easy!) time too! Why does she do it? Why does she claim she is the Best Christian? Well, most probably for the most unchristian reasons of all; for fame, fortune and earthly glory. If such things can ever be obtained through such claims, in this day and very secular age that we live in - that is!
She is, thus, after fame and the big mighty dollar - nothing else.
And THAT does NOT make Jesus very Happy AT ALL!
For He did not seek earthly riches - and, quite frankly, blogging frantically as I may do now, nor am I...!
So you can come to your own conclusions now, I do believe...
;)
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